Kemo Sabe

One course of chemotherapy down and five to go......  Wow, this is an adventure.

Chemo center

For me a course of chemotherapy consists of thee days.  The first day I am give two drugs that take about 6 hours to administer.  The time went by quickly.  JoLynne and I sat and visited without being interrupted which was unusual.  The second day was about 2-3 hours with just one drug given and the third day was the same.  After the first day I was tired but okay.  I went to a Stake Bishops meeting.  I was able to present the portion that I was assigned and then I started to feel pretty gross.  The Stake President leaned over to see if I was okay.  Hoping that it would pass I said I was okay.  Ten minutes later I was pretty sure it wouldn't pass and asked to be excused.  The Stake President was very sweet.  He had the other counselor walk me to the car to make sure I was okay and my neighbor drove me home.  He is a good man.  I came home pretty wiped out.  It's strange to be fifty years old and feel like you are eighty.  Day two wasn't too great either.  Getting the chemo wasn't bad but the rest of the day I was exhausted and nauseated.  I went with JoLynne to an orthodontist appointment for our children.  As we were leaving I was practically blown away by the smells emanating from a business next door to the orthodontist, some sort of herbal store.  YUCK!  The smell seemed to follow me downstairs.  JoLynne was asking how I was feeling.  I told her that smells were really bugging me, I felt nauseated like I didn't want to be far away from a toilet and that I was tired all the time.  She thought about it a minute and pronounced that I was pregnant!  Now I am feeling really bad that I played a key role in her feeling this way eight times.  She tells me that she isn't mad and that she got something cute at the end.  She is just too nice.

Speaking of JoLynne, she is the embodiment of an angelic person.  She is so patient, kind and caring.  She never acts like I am a hardship at all and just treats me so kindly.  I'm not easy to feed these days.  Nothing really sounds good to eat.  She is so patient looking for things that might sound good.  She gently encourages me and praises me even when I don't really do very well.  She is always finding something to praise me for.  "Eric, looked, you closed your eye a little more" or something like that.  I tell her how badly I feel that I can't contribute more right now around the house.  She simply tells me "You are getting better, that is your contribution"  I wonder if I could possibly be as patient as her.  I kind of doubt it.

This morning I woke feeling better.  My appetite was slightly back and I didn't feel quite as tired.  We ran some errands and then I came home and took an hour nap.  Yesterday it would have been a two hour nap.  I am learning to just take one day at a time.  I just can't plan for tomorrow because I don't know what tomorrow will bring.

My children have also been so sweet.  Many of the things the I would normally do around the house they are doing.  Cleaning out the rain gutter of leaves, taking care of the animals, winterizing the yard.  Elizabeth will often come up and just rub my hair or my feet because she knows that it relaxes me.  She is so tender.  Adam, who hasn't ever mowed the lawn before got out an mowed up all the leaves yesterday.  He was quite proud of himself and I was grateful.  Shanelle and Mike have been incredible.  Shanelle went down to my chemo session with me on Thursday.  It was delightful to visit with her.  She is a gem.  Mike is always coming around doing something to help.  At the moment I am writing this he is doing our dishes.  We are so lucky.

Well, I have 18 days until the chemo comes again.  I don't know how these days will play out.  One day at a time.  I will try to be patient and I hope that those around me can continue to be patient with me.