The quiet battle

notice the nice clean floor

So, I think that I have decided that this stage of the journey is more of a quiet battle.  The victories each day seem trivial and yet they aren't to me.  For example, today I moped the kitchen floor.  Wow!  Hardly blog worthy and yet it took a lot of my strength and I had to take a nap when I was done.  More importantly it meant something to JoLynne.  I am unable to contribute much of anything but at least that was something.  I ate two eggs and two sausage today.  Hardly noteworthy you might say and yet every bite was a battle for me.  I hate to admit it but I was quite proud of myself when I was done.  My prayers on the food now go something like this "Heavenly Father, please help me to eat this food"  Short and sweet but sincere.

Honestly there are successes to celebrate.  For example, I am now walking without crutches.  I use a cane sometimes but most of time I just hold JoLynne's hand.  My leg doesn't hurt anymore hardly at all.  Today my naps were only an hour instead of two.  I walked all the way around the block with JoLynne and didn't even hardly stop once.   I had the energy to write a letter to my son on his mission and to begin reading a novel to my children.   I think that I need to focus on the fact that even though today wasn't great it was much better than yesterday.  That is what I need to keep watching.  Really it has only been two days since my last dose of chemo.  I need to be patient.  That was never my best trait.

We still feel outpourings of love from those around us.  Today we had one friend bring us a wonderful soup, another brought us pies and a third brought us some delicious scones.  I will try to eat a little of each but it will take some effort.  My family is loving it though.  Mostly I appreciate the continued faith and prayers in my behalf.  I know that I am going to get better.  It will just take time.  Thank you for your continued love and concern.